Ok...In response to so many people calling and emailing asking me if I'm ok. Yes I'm fine. I'll always be fine. My hope and strength is Christ who is greater than I. That post wasn't written in the depths of the pit, but in reflection over 20 years of falling and being rescued. I'm fine and I will be fine. I'll have my moments, days, months. But I'll be rescued.
My reaction to these questions in typical melancholy (the personality) form is: "I guess I need more writing classes." Although I was compared to Hemingway and he has a collection of furniture dedicated to him now. My intention in writing the previous post was to be encouraging to others who might feel that they are the only ones who feel that way, or that there is no hope.
Now the soap box.
Our culture is afraid to feel. Not only are we afraid to feel pain and sadness as indicated for the wide variety of drugs available to eliminate them, but we are timid in joy and pleasure as indicated by the typical Sunday Morning church service. Someone mentioned that I always seem so happy and carefree in my posts and that this one seemed such a drastic difference. How could two such extremes follow each other? They don't! I feel them both at the same time! One might think they would explode experiencing such extreme emotions simultaneously. CORRECT!! You do explode....into song, the written page, canvas, or a dance floor. Don't be afraid to feel, even if it's sadness. Some of the most moving symphonies, beautiful paintings, and touching hymns were created in the midst of turmoil and pain. Yet they were able to feel the joy and peace that passes understanding all at once. FEEL! Embrace your emotions. GOD GAVE THEM TO YOU! We are special and unique among creation. CREATE! Creation itself was born out of longing for relationship. How much can you feel at once? What can you create from that?
*Quarter Turn Arabian Soap Box Dismount*
(disclaimer: I do acknowledge that there are conditions and circumstances that warrant medication and I'm not suggesting that anyone stop their meds not seek professional help for a serious issues.)